Overwhelming??

 In Love & Family, Titus Low

Yesterday I was up early to prepare to feed Titus before I stepped out to visit my 3 angel babies. National day is my maternal grandma’s death anniversary, also, taking the opportunity to visit my angel babies as well. How time flies. My paternal grandma had passed away for a year already as well. She was located near my angel babies, so now we had 1 more to visit too. It was a pretty heavy morning as I went to visit all of them. Still I knew what my agenda now is, to take care of Titus well and to see him grow up and healthy.

In the afternoon, we schedule for Titus photo shoot, we had missed the new born shoot but lucky we were still in time for the 1 month old shoot. I was waiting anxiously for it also worried not sure can Titus keep still and quiet though the shoot. Surprisingly, he did very well, accommodating to all the photographer’s poses and even had his own style, so amusing. It was hard to imagine just minutes ago before we stepped out of the house, he was crying very badly that I had to comfort him by latching him with some milk despite it was not time yet. However, reaching the studio, he was all calm and ready to start photo shooting.

So we came back thereafter and for him to have a rest. As for me, I did my breast pumping and quick shower before I stepped out to visit Raelyn whom had been warded since last night. She had been unwell so I had to visit her to see for myself to put my heart at ease too. She had been such a darling and a sweet heart to everyone that it is not easy to not miss her. However, I can’t stay for long as nowadays I am limited by my breast pumping schedule. The longest interval I can have is 5 hours before I start to suffer from engorgement again which is definitely something that I want to avoid.

On my way back home while driving, I was suddenly very overwhelmed with emotions. Since giving birth, I was drained both mentally and physically. Now I understand why some people can suffer from post natal depression. The responsibilities, work load that was suddenly onto you is a heavy one. In fact, I gained 7kgs during pregnancy and lost 10kgs after that. That 1 week when the confinement lady left, I lost another 1kg making a total of 11kgs lost. Everything related or got to do with the baby has something to do with you and you must know or learn it. I was thankfully that I had my family members to help out, though not as ideal or perfect but it is good enough for me to catch up on my rest or have a breather.

Still I look forward when Titus fall more into schedule and a routine for us to better manage. Having said that, he start to feed at different timing again making us wait and wait. Sigh…

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